Real Editors Check the Math

When running a shoestring operation, it seems there's no time to check facts or do math. This morning's rant (Letters to the Editor) comes from a guy who slipped a couple of digits but no one on the newspaper's editorial or copy desks bothered to check. Incensed by "bailout funding," our citizen-watchdog claims he "sat down with a pencil and paper and divided 1 trillion by 300 million (the country's population) and calculated $30,000 plus for every man, woman and child in this country." Sorry Bud. That would be $3,333. This simple math error has been circulating in e-mails and blog rants for going on six months now. But no one at the Sun noticed -- or bothered to count the zeroes.

Editor's Job Opening: Reading Not Required

The story is about a couple who provides foster care for newborns and infants recently taking in their 100th child. The headline kicks it off: "100 and counting." Strangely, the copy desk editor couldn't be bothered to read deeply enough into the story (like the first sentence) to learn the couple is counting babies, not birthdays, before writing the fiction: "Foster parents hit century mark." No, they are 75 years young, as the expression goes. It's the Sun copy desker who has reached early senility.


Editors who read might help with faulty modifiers in the lede and elsewhere, as well. Instead, readers are giggling because instead of focusing on a child and his dirtbike, they encounter the all-seeing smile that ate the landscape:
While gazing across the five-acre track at Charlotte BMX Sunday, a smile spread across 11-year-old Ryan Nenno's face. Grammatically, it's the spreading smile that's gazing across the track.

Two of Five W's Laid Off: Cutback Attributed to Declining Staff

xxxxx CORTEZ, Fla.: In order to save money, a newspaper executive in central Florida has announced layoffs within the ranks of the profession’s revered Five W’s.
xxxxx “We’re starting by eliminating 'when,' which can often be ignored entirely without losing story value,” said the owner and publisher of Cortez Town Bugler.
xxxxx Publisher Katharine Beecher attributed the cutback to the high cost of ink, paper, and staff training.
xxxxx “Certainly by eliminating 'when,' we’ll use that much less ink and paper. Over the course of a year, it adds up,” she said. “It’s also a challenge to train everybody in these five things and get them to remember them all, all the time. We figure on halving our training expenses and moving deadlines up 15 minutes by not requiring all five W’s from reporters in the first place,” she said.
xxxxx “Yes, another great newspaper tradition, lost to the ages,” she said.
xxxxx Although the first to garner wide spread attention for the ink- and paper-saving move, she notes her paper is following an established business model.
xxxxx “Down there in DeSoto, John Lawhorne has been omitting 'when' for years and nobody complained. We figured since nobody noticed, cutting 'when' could be the first to go, with 'where' probably next on the list of things we'll have to do without,” she said.
xxxxx The remaining W’s, “who,” “what,” and “why,” will have to carry the story, she said. “In fact, 'why' is almost completely extinct in broadcast journalism. And nobody noticed that, either."


Friday update: I rest my case.
”

City balks at offer for abandoned stockyard
By JOHN LAWHORNE STAFF WRITER DESOTO COUNTY — The Arcadia City Council balked when a Canadian businessman offered to purchase the old Arcadia Stockyard property north of Arcadia off U.S. Highway 17. The defunct stockyard was owned and operated by the state until two years ago, when the state returned the property to the city. Businessman Roger Penner offered to buy the 7-acre property, which is being used for equipment storage, for $51,000. He said the property was assessed at $141,570. The rotting pens, he noted, were not worth much. “I don’t think we can do anything until we get an appraisal,” Mayor Dick Fazzone said. Jason Henbest, sitting in for City Attorney William Galvano, noted that any offer for the property would require the city to advertise. “Someone may make you a better offer,” he said. First to balk at a sale was Councilman Dr. Roosevelt Johnson. “Are we ready to sell that property?” he asked. “I don’t think that I am.” Johnson said he was not against renting the property out. “I don’t think it would be an advantage to us to sell it at this point, especially for $51,000.” Council member Lorenzo Dixon said he agreed with Johnson, noting that with the old buildings, the land was worth $415,000. He pointed out a nearby business had paid $725,000 for its property. “So we know that the stockyard land is worth more than $51,000.” The council declined to accept Penner’s offer. Interim City Administrator Joe Fink then asked the council to listen to Arcadia Realtor Mac Martin’s proposal for future development of the stockyard property. “Would the City Council consider the possibility of a joint effort with the city, county, school board(s) and the community to redevelop the old livestock property into a cultural center that will benefit the citizens of Arcadia and DeSoto County for generations to come?” Martin asked. Martin noted there is no public place in DeSoto County with the appropriate seating, lighting and acoustics for pageants, orchestral concerts or theatrical performances. “The schools’ ‘cafetoriums’ (combination cafeteria and auditorium) are functional,” he said. “The Turner Center is great for large gatherings, but they cannot provide the type of atmosphere that enhances these fine arts activities.” Before making a decision to turn the stockyard property over to private use, Martin asked the council to consider conducting a workshop with all the parties mentioned, to discuss the idea of building a cultural center on the site. No immediate action was taken by the council on Martin’s suggestion.

When Was That?

Timeless news. This morning's police-beat roundup has fallen back into the timeless universe of the DeSoto Sun where tire rims are stolen, where someone trespasses, where someone steals a bicycle, where juveniles throw beer bottles. It has been three (even four, by one count) days since our last police beat. All this happened, you say when, John?

Hed: Happy Days are Here Again. Story: Fooled Ya

Apologies for going over old material, again, but the Sun's copy desk hasn't gotten the message yet: a hed is supposed to tell a bit about the story, like what it actually says. No making stuff up allowed.

And when a copy editor has two decks to work with, well, he/she can tell a whole lot about the story. Or, make it up twice, as happened during the Charlotte Sun's editing session last night.

Subscribers were delighted to turn to page 5 this morning and read the news: Stock surge, investors feeling comfort! Hallelujah! Oh, my dear! Oh, my 401(k)! We are delivered!

But, hold on one minute. Plunging into the story, readers can't help but realize they must be awaking from the copy editor's hallucination dream. No, stet that: hallucination.

The lede: "Investors shuttled between optimism and pessimism ..." No feeling of comfort here.

Next graf: The federal economic recovery plan "sent stocks moderately higher in a partial rebound from a plunge" the day before. No surge there.

Next: Stocks "meandered" for much of the day. No comfort. No surge.

Next, a real-person quote: "I think everybody is trying to get through all this news," the expert says. "Everybody has to digest all the tidbits of information. Everybody is looking for clarity, good, bad or indifferent." Hmmm. No surge mentioned, no word of comfort uttered.

Next: "Stocks had plummeted Tuesday ... on Wednesday the uncertainly continued." No comfort. No surge.

Next: "The Dow's 51-point rise is 'not a strong statement'" another expert opines. No surge. No comfort.

I know it gets old, but let's have the copy editors practice this until they get it right: The hed has to reflect what's actually in the story. No making it up up.

Running fantasy news is not going to return advertisers to the fold or make readers rush to sign up for year-long subscriptions. Fantasy news just makes editors and publishers look silly, unreliable, careless, clueless ...

Obit Feature Misspells Famous Name

That's Florence Nightingale, Laura, not Nightangle.

Dog Loose in a Parallel Universe

Compiling police-beat shorts must be viewed a punishment by DeSoto Sun's world-weary staff. It took Old Word Wolf years of goading to prod the grizzled John Lawhorne and his editor (a j-school product!) into including the third "W" (when) in police beat items. Until then, his typical entry read "Cows reported loose on Hanson."

Sure, it takes a bit more care to sort out when something occured. But then, that's what reporters do, no?

Alas, that little detail marking history's first draft has recently been folded into a subhed -- yielding this morning's gem:

Neighborhood Watch: These incidents were reported Saturday and Sunday.

Which means, of course, the car break-in happened Saturday and Sunday; the dog ran loose Saturday and Sunday, and the caller reporting a laser beam aimed at her house dialed 911 Saturday and Sunday. And all those arrests for probation violations and failure to pay child support and sale of controlled subtances happened on Saturday AND Sunday. What a busy little town we have.

Meanwhile, the Charlotte Sun today dedicates page 5 in all editions to its own used-car-lot-like promo, complete with a dialog balloon emerging from the ME's left ear. The barely disguised purpose is to dance on the grave of the New York Times's local.

The strangest part is the "let us know.." graf calling for our favorite cartoon! Cartoon! Chris, this is a newspaper that you are managing, not a comics sheet -- except that part called Letters to the Editor, but that's another posting.

In sort, if you don't know by now, Chris, give me a jingle and we'll talk.

Well, OK, Old Word Wolf will play along.
What I'd like to see in my paper is:
1. Actual copy editing; stories are read and edited with grace and intelligence.
2. Actual assignments that reflect a watchdog -- not a lapdog -- approach to local officials, issues, and events.
3. Actual reporting in some depth with intelligence, covering schools, government, and all the other little "quasi governmental" places where tax dollars are funneled.
4. Less Dr. Donohue in news hole and more coverage of significant events elsewhere on the planet; less reader-provided plagiarism, and the elimination of all Kid-Lit submissions. You can also make room for real news by eschewing the minutes of meetings for clubs that 14 women belong to and which record table decorations and luncheon menus, leading with the phrase "at the lovely home of our hostess ... "

That's something I'd like to see in "MY" newspaper.

Plagiarism Goes Viral

Is it plagiarism? Let’s see: Erin Hess Fitch, who is not a doctor, writes what is essentially a medical article for Sun newspapers. It's composed in a recognizable "corporate style:" not an adverb in sight, bland, soulless prose. It contains not a single line of attribution. Red-alert flag goes up.

It's on a topic few care about until the need strikes. It's on a topic that bears no relationship to news. It discusses watery diarrhea, for gawd's sake. More red-alerts.

It's clearly not journalism. But is it plagiarism?

Well, Fitch's article closely follows the wording -- to the point of being identical in many places -- of an article written for the Centers for Disease Control and posted at its Web site. Strike one.

Fitch evasively moves around a few words and does some light editing, but the order of ideas is identical to the text posted at the CDC Web site Strike two.

Fitch puts her by line on the article and presents the report to readers as her own work. Strike three. Yup. That's plagiarism.
Here's the detail.

Sun Hed: Dealing with the dreaded ‘stomach flu’
Erin Hess Fitch: Gastroenteritis, often called the “stomach flu,” is inflammation of the stomach, small and large intestines. It is caused by viruses. These viruses include rotavirus, norovirus and adenovirus. Gastroenteritis is not usually caused by bacteria, parasites, medications or other medical conditions. Symptoms, however, may be very similar to diseases caused by those sources.
CDC: What is viral gastroenteritis?
Gastroenteritis means inflammation of the stomach and small and large intestines. Viral gastroenteritis is an infection caused by a variety of viruses that results in vomiting or diarrhea. It is often called the "stomach flu," although it is not caused by the influenza viruses.
CDC: What causes viral gastroenteritis?
Many different viruses can cause gastroenteritis, including rotaviruses, noroviruses, adenoviruses,type 40 or 41, sapoviruses, and astroviruses. Viral gastroenteritis is not caused by bacteria (such as Salmonella or Escherichia coli) or parasites (such as Giardia), or by medications or other medical conditions, although the symptoms may be similar. Your doctor can determine if the diarrhea is caused by a virus or by something else.
Erin Hess Fitch: Primary symptoms are watery diarrhea and vomiting. You may also have headache, fever and cramps. Symptoms start one or two days following infection with the virus and may last for up to 10 days, depending on which virus caused the illness.
CDC: What are the symptoms of viral gastroenteritis?
The main symptoms of viral gastroenteritis are watery diarrhea and vomiting. The affected person may also have headache, fever, and abdominal cramps ("stomach ache"). In general, the symptoms begin 1 to 2 days following infection with a virus that causes gastroenteritis and may last for 1 to 10 days, depending on which virus causes the illness.
Erin Hess Fitch: For most healthy adults, gastroenteritis is not a serious illness. However, it can be very serious for infants, young children and people who are unable to care for themselves, such as the disabled or elderly, because they are at a greater risk for dehydration. Immunocompromised people are at risk for dehydration. They may get a more serious illness with greater vomiting or diarrhea and may need to be hospitalized.
CDC: Is viral gastroenteritis a serious illness?
For most people, it is not. People who get viral gastroenteritis almost always recover completely without any long-term problems. Gastroenteritis is a serious illness, however, for persons who are unable to drink enough fluids to replace what they lose through vomiting or diarrhea. Infants, young children, and persons who are unable to care for themselves, such as the disabled or elderly, are at risk for dehydration from loss of fluids. Immune compromised persons are at risk for dehydration because they may get a more serious illness, with greater vomiting or diarrhea. They may need to be hospitalized for treatment to correct or prevent dehydration.
Erin Hess Fitch: Viral gastroenteritis is very contagious and can be spread through close contact with sick people; sharing food, water and eating utensils; or by eating or drinking contaminated foods. Food can become contaminated by the people who prepare it or handle it if they do not wash their hands regularly after using the bathroom. Shellfish may be contaminated by sewage. Drinking water may become contaminated by sewage and be the source of the spread of these viruses.
CDC: Is the illness contagious? How are these viruses spread?
Yes, viral gastroenteritis is contagious. The viruses that cause gastroenteritis are spread through close contact with infected persons (for example, by sharing food, water, or eating utensils). Individuals may also become infected by eating or drinking contaminated foods or beverages.
Erin Hess Fitch: Viral gastroenteritis affects people worldwide, with each virus having its own seasonal activity. In the U.S., rotavirus and astrovirus infections occur in the cooler months of the year, October to April. Adenovirus infections can occur throughout the year. Norovirus outbreaks can occur in an institutional setting: schools, child-care facilities and nursing homes. It also is seen in other group settings such as banquet halls, cruise ships, dormitories and campgrounds.
CDC: Where and when does viral gastroenteritis occur?
Viral gastroenteritis affects people in all parts of the world. Each virus has its own seasonal activity. For example, in the United States, rotavirus and astrovirus infections occur during the cooler months of the year (October to April), whereas adenovirus infections occur throughout the year. Norovirus outbreaks can occur in institutional settings, such as schools, child care facilities, and nursing homes, and can occur in other group settings, such as banquet halls, cruise ships, dormitories, and campgrounds.
Erin Hess Fitch: People of all ages and backgrounds can get viral gastroenteritis. People in specific age groups are more susceptible to some viruses. Rotavirus and norovirus are most common in infants and young children under 5. Adenoviruses and astroviruses are most common in young children, but older children and adults can contract the illness. Noroviruses most commonly cause diarrhea in older children and adults.
CDC: Who gets viral gastroenteritis?
Anyone can get it. Viral gastroenteritis occurs in people of all ages and backgrounds. However, some viruses tend to cause diarrheal disease primarily among people in specific age groups. Rotavirus and norovirus infections are the most common cause of diarrhea in infants and young children under 5 years old. Adenoviruses and astroviruses cause diarrhea mostly in young children, but older children and adults can also be affected. Norwalk and Noroviruses are more likely to cause diarrhea in older children and adults.
Erin Hess Fitch: Viral gastroenteritis is generally diagnosed by a doctor on the basis of symptoms and an exam of the patient. Rotavirus can be diagnosed by lab testing of stool specimens.
CDC: How is viral gastroenteritis diagnosed?
Generally, viral gastroenteritis is diagnosed by a physician on the basis of the symptoms and medical examination of the patient. Rotavirus infection can be diagnosed by laboratory testing of a stool specimen. Tests to detect other viruses that cause gastroenteritis are not in routine use, but the viral gastroenteritis unit at CDC can assist with special analysis upon request.
Erin Hess Fitch: The most important component of treatment for viral gastroenteritis is to prevent dehydration. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommend that families with infants and young children keep a supply of oral rehydration solution (Pedialyte) at home at all times, and use it when the first diarrheal episode occurs. It is important to follow the written directions on the package and to use clean, bottled or boiled water. Antibiotics (which have no effect on viruses) and other treatments should be given only on recommendation from a doctor.
CDC: How is viral gastroenteritis treated?
The most important of treating viral gastroenteritis in children and adults is to prevent severe loss of fluids (dehydration). This treatment should begin at home. Your physician may give you specific instructions about what kinds of fluid to give. CDC recommends that families with infants and young children keep a supply of oral rehydration solution (ORS) at home at all times and use the solution when diarrhea first occurs in the child. ORS is available at pharmacies without a prescription. Follow the written directions on the ORS package, and use clean or boiled water. Medications, including antibiotics (which have no effect on viruses) and other treatments, should be avoided unless specifically recommended by a physician.
Erin Hess Fitch: Viral gastroenteritis infections can be reduced by frequent handwashing, prompt disinfection of contaminated surfaces with a household bleach solution (1 to 10 dilution) and prompt washing of soiled clothing in hot water. Food or water that is thought to be contaminated should be avoided.
CDC: Can viral gastroenteritis be prevented?
Persons can reduce their chance of getting infected by frequent handwashing, prompt disinfection of contaminated surfaces with household chlorine bleach-based cleaners, and prompt washing of soiled articles of clothing. If food or water is thought to be contaminated, it should be avoided.
Erin Hess Fitch: For more information about viral gastroenteritis, call your personal physician or the Hardee County Health Department at 863-773-4161. You may also visit the CDC Web site at cdc.gov.

Strangest Feature of the Week

File this one in the folder tabbed Not News & Never Will Be. The Charlotte Sun plastered all its regional front pages Wednesday with this: Frugal nuptials. You be the judge:

...the bride and groom shopped locally, compared prices, and cut costs any way they could in order to cover their estimated $15,000 wedding budget [... and] used personal touches to decorate their reception, which was held at Hilton Longboat Key Beachfront Resort.

The rookie reporter is parsimonious with facts: she doesn't report how many people, exactly, the frugal bride wined and dined at the Hilton for a mere $15,000. The reporter is naive enough to forget that the major demographic feature of her paper's circulation area is us old folks -- for whom the typical Social Security annual income hovers around $13,000 a year. Frugal: neither bride nor reporter knows the meaning of the word.

I Want to Be a Riter

The big DeSoto County feature this morning is John Lawhorne's report of a career day for students. Middle school kids visited businesses and shadowed workers. It was probably inevitable that some would tour the newspaper office. Lawhorne writes:

Eighth-grader [young man's name] had expressed an interest in becoming an writer. [Young woman's name] wanted to explore what it would be to work as a cartoonist.

The incorrect indefinite article and the missing half of the predicate verb aren't enough. Lawhorne also demonstrates that neither pronoun control nor graceful composition is required to write a daily story:

[Young man's name] said he thought his experience with Wilson was 'cool.' He said he thought he was the only one who liked cartoons. ... Blosser and other particpating businesses later took their respective students to lunch.

Old Word Wolf's initials spell OWW for a reason. The language arts teachers did both youngsters a disservice when they sent the kids to cover to this beat.

When to Spike a Photo: Rule 1

When the picture shows a young woman aiming a big, long, red thing at her mid-section, you don't publish it.





And when the newspaper wants to win a photo contest, this is what the Venice Gondolier does: The editors download a couple of stock photos from the Web and print the cutline: The Venice Gondolier is printing this photo for submission to the Kodak-Inland Print Quality competition.

Update: Old Word Wolf has been informed by a veteran photojournalist that Kodak asks all its Inland Contest entrants to print the same two photos. I'll go with that. But why, oh, why didn't Gondolier editors take just one teensy minute to write a little story: "We're entering a Kodak photo printing contest with these photos. Last year, we won first place. For those of you who are into the technical stuff, we're printing these on a BigMomma Web Press at a gazillion dots per inch ... and so on. It actually would have made a nice little feature -- serving the reader even while being self serving.

Readers Get Kid Lit Instead of Journalism

The "reefer" this morning is a regular Friday abomination. It refers readers to page 11 to catch the latest: "Gussie the Gator meets Pickles, the twin of Tickles the Octopus."

Here's the background: For the last 18 months or so, a nice lady who lives in one of Arcadia's several retirement parks fills her idle hours by writing seven-paragraph animal vignettes for children. The stories feature little animals with cute names swimming, picnicking, avoiding bee stings, safely crossing the road and such. A few months back, when summer came, the nice lady retreated to the north for the season, and the weekly installments stopped. Old Word Wolf was sure the torture was over. Arcadian news reporters would find they didn't need this space filler from a writer who addresses the kindergarten (and must surely be, OWW speculates, the publisher's great auntie, perhaps?). The real journalists would find plenty of news to pursue. Between city hall, schools, courthouse and jail, OWW heartily hoped that real news -- the type that informs taxpayers, citizens, businesses, young people, and visitors about their community -- would resume. OWW was wrong.

To read how awful it really is, the latest installment is tucked below the fold:

Little Tail plays with Tickles and Pickles
By FLORENCE BARBORO
em>SPECIAL TO THE SUN
One bright, sunny, yet cool day, Gussie the Gator and Little Tail the Gator were sunning themselves in the pond. After a while, Little Tail said to Gussie, “Daddy, I’m going out to find someone to play with. I am tired of just floating and sunning myself.” He did not need to swim far before he ran into Tickles the Octopus. Now, Tickles got her name because she laughed and tickled you with her eight legs and made you laugh and laugh, which she was trying to do to Little Tail. Suddenly, Little Tail saw two octopi. So he said to Tickles, “Are there two of you?”
“No,” replied Tickles, “that is my twin brother, whose name is Pickles. When I was born I always had a smile on my face and eyes wide open, ready to play and laugh. So that is why my mother named me Tickles.
“But my brother always has his eyes half-open and never smiles. Sometimes he is really grumpy and never wants to play. So my mother said to him, ‘I’m going to name you Pickles because you always have a sour look on your face.’” With that, Little Tail said to Tickles, “Let’s see if he will play with us.” Tickles said, “I bet he won’t.” Sure enough, when Little Tail swam up to Pickles the Octopus to play, Pickles swam away and hid behind a rock, saying, “Stay away from me!” So Little Tail swam back to Tickles the Octopus and said, “Boy! He sure is grumpy. He acts just like a sour pickle. Your mother gave him a good name.” So off Little Tail and Tickles went to find Bubbles the Goldfish to swim and play and have fun. They played hide and seek. So ended another happy and beautiful day in paradise, in sunny Arcadia.

Florence Barboro is a DeSoto County resident and regular contributor to the Sun for Cross Creek Country Club and RV Resort. She has written a series of short stories geared toward young children. Look for her story each week in The Arcadian.

Wanted: A Copy Editor

A Charlotte Sun columnist and all the newspaper's copy editors marred their description of yesterday's big event. No, we don’t mean Steve Baumann’s ridiculous – and clichéd – column lede (“Don’t tell my boss, but I stayed home yesterday to watch the inauguration ...”). We’re referring to his uncorrected, erroneous use of the phrase “an historic.”

As a grizzled newspaper man, Baumann is certainly familiar with his profession’s guide to words and their uses, the AP Stylebook. It is expressly specific on the book's alphabetical Page 1 “A,” third entry down, about the article for this particular adjective: it should be “a” as in “a historic.” Of course, one organization’s stylebook isn’t the language's bible (and even editors can't change a direct quotation from a speaker). But, when a highly educated columnist expounds, readers expect a professional standard.

Baumann, apart from not using the standard, isn't hearing his own language. “An” accompanies a word that opens with a vowel sound. Baumann has not (to date) spoken of or written “an history book,” or “an hopeful event,” or “an highly educated columnist.”

“Think Howard Cosell”

But who am I? Here’s the thinking of the copy editor’s copy editor, Bill Walsh, in a passage from his book, The Elephants of Style:

For choosing a or an, spelling doesn't matter; pronunciation does. A is for consonant sounds; an is for vowel sounds. The ever-popular an historic is incorrect, at least for American speakers, because historic does not begin with a vowel sound. Even those Americans who say "an istoric" will admit that they say "historic," with the consonant h, when the word stands alone. I don't care whether "an istoric" rolls off your tongue more easily than "a historic"; you don't go altering your pronunciation of a word in order to change the article you use before it. Your comfort is none of the language's concern. Most of the times I've heard "an historic," however, it has been from blustery types who heartily pronounce the h. Think Howard Cosell.

Ain’t Headlines Gotta be Accurate?

Another reason editors are paid to read stories before publication is to write headlines. It always helps if an editor understands what she/he has read. Luke Wilson writes today about his dismal attempts at cooking and sets the scene: “I don’t ... have famous restaurants beating down my door ... nor do I have TV food guru Rachel Ray calling me for cooking tips ...”

Unfortunately, the “copy editor” sums up the story as “Rachel Ray ain’t got a thing on me,” which is precisely opposite the columnist’s point. And apparently also without reading the story, the front page editor decides he/she likes the snappy country colloquialism so much – which the columnist never uses, by the way – that it winds up on the front page as a teaser. Ain’t that cute?

And speaking of cute, it would be respectful to readers in DeSoto County (where the school superintendent reports a 99 percent literacy rate among the general population and 100 percent among newspaper subscribers) to eschew fake dialect entirely. Today's front page "Hoggin' the show" is condescending -- just as all the rest of the newspaper's editors' attempts at country cute have been. Yes, it happens a lot.

It'sWrong, but Run it Again Anyway

The consumer-advocate column ran yesterday in the Charlotte Sun with a headline saying the opposite of what the writer reported. So, the pick-up editor runs it again today in the DeSoto Sun -- with the same incorrect headline. What the story says doesn't matter (see yesterday's posting), and whether there's time to fix it doesn't matter either.

Copy Editors Agree: Subjects and Verbs Must

The headline's subject is not only plural, it's plural in triplicate. The verb needs to be plural. Once will do. Lower, in the story's second graf, the writer tells us " ... none of the collisions have brought down a plan." None, as copy editors -- and readers know -- is singular.


What the Story Says Doesn't Matter

On the local front, the Charlotte Sun's consumer
advocate advises caution when entering
pay-to-publish literatry contests. But
the copy desk disagrees and says so in the hed.

What the Reporter Left Out When She Phoned It In

Any improvement in reading scores is good news. But the local paper's report on the topic should make readers wonder if the reporter or the copy desk editor (who writes the heds) learned to read very well. Starting at the top, the headline screams:
Districts ace reading list

No; one district came in at about the middle and the other came in dead last on a list made up of districts that scored between the 75th and the 99th percentiles, a comparative ranking of participants. (We used to call it "grading on a curve." And, doesn't one "ace a test?" But why let the language as we all know it get in the way of the appearance of a snappy headline.)

DeSoto, Charlotte Counties at top of state program

No, they're not. Among counties that have been in the program six years, Dixie and Bradford were the two districts "at the top" of the fourth quartile. DeSoto ranked third and Charlotte ranked eighth, last in the top quartile.


The reporter writes: "According to the state education Web site, Reading First is a federal grant program that allows districts and schools to use scientifically based reading instruction in classrooms to allows all children to learn to read well by the end of third grade." (my emphases)

No. According to the state education Web site, the grant program requires districts to use scientifically based reading instruction. The reporter's use of "allows" -- twice -- invites readers to wonder if other reading classes are not allowed to use scientifically proven methods. The idea is silly, of course, and the silliness is rooted in the reporter's careless writing without benefit of a skilled copy editor.

And -- just an observation here, based on a decade of covering schools -- we also wonder what "scientifically based" means. Sure, it's a phrase tossed around (a lot) on the DOE Web page, but that doesn't mean it's English. (Educationese is a lot like copspeak, except it has a graduate degree.) The reporter never gets around to explaining the term or making an effort to show readers what it means for those who count -- the students, teachers, and taxpayers.

"Ultimately, the program hopes to increase the percentage of students reading at or above grade level, while reducing the percentage of students with serious reading difficulties. " The program doesn't hope. Teachers and parents hope. The program's goal is to increase the number of students reading at grade level. Be precise.

"According to the DOE, these schools increased grade-level reading by 14.72 percent since last year ..." No. The number of students reading at grade level increased 14.72 percent over last year. Be accurate.

Amid all the glowing, chest puffing, self-serving comments collected from the superintendents, the reporter needs to tell readers how the schools qualified for Reading First grants: They were designated as failures at reading preparation in the No Child Left Behind initiative and needed extra help to do the job.

A good education reporter would also have told readers, taxpayers, and parents:

--How much money has flowed into the school district in these grants (a figure not readily available on the school budget report -- there is no line-item for the federal "Reading First" funds, either as income or outgo.)
--If the program requires specially purchased books (remember the 2007 texbook scandal and congressional hearings surrounding this very program?)
--How many instructional folks have been added to achieve these goals.
--Whether the grant affects any grade other than third grade.
--Who, in the district, is in charge of the federal reading program.
--In what way the program is related to "No Child Left Behind."
--Whether Reading First instructional folks are counted as part of the state-mandated student-teacher ratio.
--How "scientifcally based" reading instruction is implemented.

-- How many children are represented by the 14.72 percent figure?

-- How much money per child is being spent for that increase?

And oh, so much more. As it is, everything Pam Staik says -- except for the local self-congratulations -- can be read in the press release. There has been no "value added" for the reader, no enlightenment for the taxpayer, and certainly no real journalism.

Accuracy and Trust: Journalism's Horse and Carriage

DeSoto Sun newspaper editors tell readers that local is important -- but evidently not important enough to write about or edit. Both key jobs of journalism have been left to -- well, sorry -- left to amateurs. And it shows.

Over at the Lake Placid Journal, second verse, same as first.

An epic recap of a state trooper's murder is marred from the first line, which opens with, "Two years have past ...." Come on, guys. Eighth graders know that should be "passed."

Next line: "For 17 gruelling hours the usual tranquil community ..." Ninth graders know that should be should be "the usually tranquil community .. ."

Next leg: "While undergoing emergency surgery at the rural community hospital, his wife and two children..." A copy editor would quietly change that to "While the officer was undergoing surgery...," avoiding the misdirected medical procedure.

Next leg: "Officers staged across the highway.." A copy editor would gently inquire, "staged what?" because "staged" is a transitive verb.

Next leg: "... taxed with the responsiblity ... " A wise copy editor would silently change that laugh line to "tasked with the responsibility ..."

The rest of the narrative-style recap -- intended to be a tribute -- is riddled with randomly Germanic capitalizations, illogical tense shifts, a profound ignorance of basic comma rules, awkward echos and redundancies, and a failure to attribute a single fact -- which is what journalism is all about. The story is not a tribute. It's a mess.

If the newspaper publisher genuinely cared about local news, he would assign someone the job of editing to save himself and his writers the embarrassment of childish writing. That, in turn, might salvage a shred of trust: If the newspaper's writers don't know how to write coherent sentences and editors don't know how to edit them, why should readers trust the paper's ability to report? Or its "commitment to local news?"

Local Journalism: Dying a Slow Death

The morning newspaper brings this news, printed on a single sheet of paper, composed by the general manager (the guy with a ring of keys). It was tucked in the home-delivery bag, and it apparently bypassed the pesky copy editing that might have provided clarity and coherence or supplied more than a series of breathless imperatives:

DeSoto Sun Customers

Please Read

The DeSoto Sun Newspaper will begin delivery six days per
week. The DeSoto paper will publish Tuesday through Sunday.

No Monday delivery! Effective 1/19/09

No home delivery or single copy papers in stores or racks
starting Monday 1/19/0-9 and contining on as a six day per week delivered paper.

Subscription rates will maintain current price point as a six day delivered product.

E-Mail your concerns and comments to ...

...

The news -- as told not by the publisher but by the guy with the thermostat key -- is this daily's publication schedule is being cut to six days a week. It's happening just a couple of months after home delivery was suspended to most of the county and a week after the complete shutdown of another paper in the Dunn-Rankin chain. The news is subscription rates will continue as if the paper were available seven days a week, says the man in charge of loading the trucks.
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Old Word Wolf's "concerns and comments" are actually questions: Will this in any way improve local news coverage? Will reporters and editors have more time to delve into local government and schools and report on tax money at work?
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Doubt it; that's not how things work. And the irony is, one of the newspaper's general managers, Lang Capasso, wrote in his (unedited, grammatically challenged) column just yesterday:

"Many newspapers seem to have forgotten what made them important to people. We haven’t and that’s why Sun Coast Media papers will always be at the table as the coffee is being drunk, the eggs eaten and the conversation turns to the news. We recognize that local news and the community are important to people. They’re important to us as well because, after all, we’re a part of this community too and what affects our neighbors down the street affects us as well."

I like that part: "... will always be at the table ..."

Always means never on Monday, not at all in Hardee -- and oh, only on Wednesdays and Saturdays in Venice, and only when the mail carrier comes if you live in the rural parts of DeSoto.

It's a shame, because if the Dunn-Rankins had understood genuine journalism, instead of "photos provided," rehashed press releases, plagiarizing preachers, and forced features there might have been a little more reader loyalty and support -- and thus value for the fast-disappearing advertisers.

The Big Picture Conserves News-Gathering Energy

Too bad this looks fairly innocuous in thumbnail. In real life, this six-column wide, half-page tall color photo of a man adjusting an amusement-park car screams, "Arcadia's six reporters and editors didn't write any news, cover local government or schools, and no one sent us any consumer-generated content, so you'll just have to look at the pretty picture."

So, why not go to the trouble to inform Arcadians about the world around them? Surely there was a Florida story on the wires, surely there is news from across the ocean ... yes, it's the hometown section, but if you're having production problems, this is not the way to carry on

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And .....

R.I.P. Hardee Sun

Today is the last day Hardee County, a DeSoto look-alike just north of the border, will have its own newspaper. Sun Coast Media Group's staff writer, Carol Sakowitz, announced in her column today that it's the last issue with "Hardee" in the mast. She didn't say why (we can guess: economics, economy of scale, ad revenues, and such) -- only that she's enjoyed her seven months as a reporter.